I received one of my greatest blessings 18 years ago today.
It was an incomparable gift. It was also one I thought I'd never
have. But, because I did receive that gift, I can tell you there are still
miracles performed in our behalf. I don't often speak of my belief in God on my
blog. It's not the focus of my blog although it is very much part of my life. I
do firmly believe that there is a loving heavenly father that hears the
groanings of our heart and is not unmoved by our joys, pain or sorrow.
Just as we enjoy giving gifts to those we love or giving comfort
those we love when they feel pain—they matter to us—so does our heavenly
father. We matter to him and he sees us
as individuals—some of which he calls friend, all of which he has love and
affection for. My gift is evidence of his love for me. While I have received
many gifts and blessings from him, my son is the greatest personal gift he has
given me.
Today was a day of reflection and yes, thanksgiving. I remember
counting fingers and toes, the first night home and the realization that this
little tiny human wasn't going home with anyone else. He was all mine. I have
to tell you, there was a moment of panic when I realized that. The sense of
responsibility that settled on my shoulders, coupled with the intense love I
felt, and the plethora of what ifs that plagued me. But, it was only
momentary because I got on with day-to-day living. 
For all the joy and
satisfaction my gift has given me, I have to say that there is a measure of
sadness today. My bundle of joy (sometimes my major pain in the butt) is now a
young man of 18 and soon to go out on his own. It will leave a bit of a hole in
my life. It's not a bad thing but I do miss the little boy he was and all the
firsts that came with him. Time has flown by, as it is wont to do, and I'm
remembering all the firsts. The pride I felt watching his first wobbling steps.
Soon I'll be watching his first steps away from home as he picks
up his responsibilities in the Navy.
My son, when I look at you I realize that truly,"Every good gift and every perfect present is from above, for it comes down from the Father..." James 1:17
