MONDAY MUSINGS— HEARING VOICES

My husband cracks me up.

He loves westerns. He and the Western channel are good buds. I believe he’s watched about every western series made—all 145 or so. Me? I’m not a big fan of westerns—well aside from Bonanza, Big Valley, and The Virginian (when I was very young, about 9 or 10-ish I had a wicked crush on Little Joe). These were my dad’s favorites. 

I remember the theme songs to two others Dad watched regularly, The Rebel (Johnny Yuma) and Rawhide. I say the theme songs because we were usually in bed when they came on, but I can sing the both songs—Have Gun Will Travel too. The only Western I really liked was Wild, Wild West when I was a bit older. Anything else? Forget it.

My husband has a fabulous memory for dialog—especially for anything Lonesome Dove. That’s top on the list of westerns he loves.  I actually had to get downright threatening when he thought going to live in Montana (he calls it MUN-tana) would be a good thing. 

Really?

Have you seen the snow they get up there?

Well, I have. No way, no how. Have a good time. Be sure to write, lol! 

One of his very good friends (and fellow Lonesome Dove aficionados) actually did move there which tickled Dan to no end to think of Terrence “Woodrow” in MUN-tana. Terry has a magnetized sign that goes on his truck that says, “Hat Creek Cattle Company”. You’ll never guess who got that for him.

Any number of situations can have Dan quoting ole Gus or Woodrow and he doesn't particularly care where he is when he does. My son and I know, from long observation, when he’s setting up for a quote ‘fest, particularly in restaurants and we tend to hide behind our menus. Slow service or a “surly Bartender” will get you, “One of the things we didn’t put up with back then is dawdling service and as you can see, we still don’t…put up with it.”  At a table with friends, he’s been known to raise his Gold Margarita on rocks, with salt, “Here’s to the sunny slopes of long ago.” I fully expect him to tell me on his deathbed, “My God, Woodrow. It has been quite a party, ain’t it?”

My husband also loves corny jokes and sayings. He has pages of stuff he’s made up. Other things are from pop culture like movies, TV shows, or comedy skits. He loves “voices” and is very good with mimicking what he hears—everything from Dirty Harry to one of his favorites, South Park’s Lock Ness Monster skit. Yep, he’s been known to launch into that one at any time but especially when he hears the price of something being $2 or $3.50, “and I said tree-fitty?” He can do the whole thing, gestures, inflections, voices and all. 

Bless his heart, Dan loves the voices and does them very well. Too well.

Which is why we have a sign hanging beside the back door that reads, Warning, Alleged Comedian in residence. Enter at your own risk.

MONDAY MUSINGS SAVORING THE MOMENTS

Life gets complicated. So many decisions and issues to deal with. I don't know about you but there are times I'm like a fluff of cotton caught in the whirlwind blown here and there. My head is so full of stuff that everything blurs around me. It's a rough ride with no time to really look around. 

There are times I must fight my way out and just savor the beauty of a moment in time. Stop and anchor myself to the now. Look around and see the beauty that surrounds me. Let go of all the must do issues and just be. You'd think that would be easy but it's not always. Sometimes I have to give myself permission to step off the platform of the whirlwind and just let it move on for awhile.

An afternoon on the trail

I did that on Sunday afternoon. Took the time to breath in fresh scent of the grass, visit with my animals, listen to the wind and the call of the birds. Watch the shadows of the sun crawl across the pastures. Just be in the moment. I could feel the tightness unwind from inside and awareness of my surroundings unfurl and soothe me. I needed that.

Doctari and  Sassy

Pasture in the afternoon sun

A pair of armadillos that live down by the pond

Me darlin' Sassy being proud and pretty

These moments are ones to savor. They make you glad you're alive.

How do you find the moments to unwind? What do you do to make it happen?

MONDAY MUSINGS AND HOLES IN THE GROUND.

Who pays much attention to a small hole in the ground? Especially when you have stupid colonies of moles burrowing under your front yard or visiting armadillos that love to dig small holes foraging for food after dark and get all your dogs going because they can see them. 

Obviously, we don’t pay a great deal of attention to them.

My husband decided the grass needed mowing after a week of rain. Yeah, the grass was definitely growing tall even though it had been cut two weeks before. We usually mow the grass about every week when we get a lot of rain and every other week when it’s drier. We don’t use a push mower because our yard takes up almost an acre. We have a riding mower. Love my John Deere.

Since I had to work most of this weekend Dan decided to do the mowing Sunday afternoon and told me to go take a nap. Perfect suggestion to me, thanks honey. When I’m tired I tend to nap about an hour and a half and I sleep pretty deep and I was very tired. I fell asleep to the sounds of the mower and the smell of cut grass.

An hour later I’m suddenly awakened by screams. To be precise my husband’s screams of pain. That’s a heart-thumping guarantee to awaken anyone. One moment you’re asleep and the next you’re hyper alert and ready for battle. Having the Danes go off with serious barking didn't help. By the time I get out of the bed room Dan had made it to the north side of the house, still screaming, and around to back. I look out the window and the mower is abandoned but upright. My mind has a couple of seconds to figure out the probable cause of the ruckus. Bees. Well, to be specific, yellow jackets.

Sure enough, he has a small cloud of them flying behind him. I had no idea if he hit a ground nest or there was a nest in branches of the lilac bushes that go across the front of the yard. Dan made it to the back door and dashed in. Yellow Jackets pinged against the glass door. 

I had already gotten down the antihistamines and starting a bowl of baking powder paste. He’s not allergic to bee stings but I would rather err on the side of caution and I didn't know how many stings he actually had. Fortunately Dan had on heavy denim knee length shorts and a thick work shirt with a double thick yoke across the back of his shoulders and a good-sized collar. The Yellow Jackets couldn't really penetrate the material well enough to do any real damage and the collar mostly protected the back of his neck and shoulders. He always wears a hat (and glasses) so his face and eyes were safe. There were a few of the nasty things tangled in the thick hair near the back of his neck. We had to get those out. He had several stings on that part of his scalp. Tore the heck out of his lower arm and got him pretty good on one calf and knee. Maybe four or five bites. Most had been on his shoulders where, thankfully, he was protected.

It was a ground nest. Now keep in mind we mow frequently. No attacks two weeks ago when he mowed the same area and in the same way. So either it’s a new nest or more likely, the nest had been there but not on the area we mow but had grown toward the yard since the last time we mowed and with a new entry way there.

Dan’s cussing a blue moon and threatening fire (he’s a secret pyromaniac) and destruction once the sentries went to ground. I’m having a vision of a major fire in the front yard with Dan chanting, burn baby burn. 

Um, no, sweetheart, no gas and no fire. 

We need to see where the entries are and we can use hot mint soapy water—like we have on a few nests in the past. It works fine and mint oil is very effective in killing bugs or wasps. Then he remembered he had two cans of wasp/bee stream shooters. So he did that followed up with water. Hopefully it worked. I don’t like pesticides because of the animals and if they were to walk in it… and I’m highly allergic to them.

A few years back we had a huge ground nest in the far back corner of the yard. It had several entryways. We figured it was at least four foot wide underground. All I know is it took a long time for the fire to burn out. It’s not good for the ground but Dan had waited until I went somewhere, to grocery store I think, to do the deed. I’d have pitched a fit had I been there.

So the moral of this story is to pay attention to holes in the ground and scope them out to see if there is wasp activity. If there is proceed with caution especially when mowing in the spring or fall. Yellow Jackets are very aggressive in the fall as food becomes less plentiful.

Dan was fortunate because it could have been oh, so much more serious. If he hadn't quickly recognized what was happening and high tailed it out of the area he could have had hundreds of stings instead of fifteen or twenty of them and be spending the night in the hospital instead of snoozing in his recliner.

CAROL KILGORE INTRODUCING KAT MARENGO

Hi! I’m Kat Marengo, and I live in the soon-to-be-released novel SECRETS OF HONOR. I’m here to dish on Carol Kilgore, the author who created me.

Well, Carol thinks she created me, but we both know better. I found her mind floating up in the clouds one day and hopped inside. Omigosh, what a mess!

She kept tossing things in and other things out. I got hit with a couple of pillows and had to dodge a toy truck before I realized she was searching for Christmas gifts. See, I arrived between books.

Once I caught on to how she thought, the rest was easy. I started tossing in things I liked, and I knew the minute she realized I was there. Then I messed with her head for a while before I introduced myself.

Of course once I did, she tried to take over. Carol initially wanted me to be an antihero with a little ink and some piercings. I laughed and told her she needed to chill. It might’ve been fun, but my mama would've pitched one big hissy fit if she’d seen me that way. 

Besides, while I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself in most situations, I’m a little bit girly-girl, too. So Carol listened to reason. She also heard me when I said I'd really a man in my life. The minute I laid eyes on Dave Krizak, I didn't know who to hug first–him or Carol. How she knew I wanted someone and with muscles and blue eyes, I don't know. She read my mind as easily as I read hers.

Besides Dave Krizak, who’s in a whole class all by himself, SECRETS OF HONOR was so much fun. I got to show off some of my skills, and one of my new dresses. We had a huge mission to accomplish, and our team came right together. We like to take all the credit, but to be fair, Carol may have had a hand in making sure our work paid off.

I told her if she ever wanted to write a sequel, I’m all in. She said she’d remember that and let me know if that time ever came up. One thing about Carol – she plays her cards close to her chest. She’s a Scorpio, you know. They’re like that.

Oops, would you look at the time. I gotta run. Meeting Dave, Peter, and Remy at Parrot Cay – it’s the best bar for our kind here in San Juan.

What are we doing in San Juan?

I may talk a lot, but I don’t share secrets, especially SECRETS OF HONOR.

                                                                                                                                                  

By the end of a long evening working as a special set of eyes for the presidential security detail, all Kat Marengo wants is to kick off her shoes and stash two not-really-stolen rings in a secure spot. Plus, maybe sleep with Dave Krizak. No, make that definitely sleep with Dave Krizak. The next morning, she wishes her new top priorities were so simple.

As an operative for a covert agency buried in the depths of the Department of Homeland Security, Kat is asked to participate in a matter of life or death—locate a kidnapped girl believed to be held in Corpus Christi, Texas. Since the person doing the asking is the wife of the president and the girl is the daughter of her dearest friend, it’s hard to say no.

Kat and Dave quickly learn the real stakes are higher than they or the first lady believed and will require more than any of them bargained for. 

The kicker? They have twenty-four hours to find the girl—or the matter of life or death will become more than a possibility.

Although Carol has deep Texas roots, she’s lived up and down the eastern seaboard and in other locations across the U.S. as a Coast Guard wife. She sees mystery and subterfuge everywhere. And she’s a sucker for a good love story—especially those with humor and mystery. Crime Fiction with a Kiss gives her the latitude to mix and match throughout the broad mystery and romance genres. Having flexibility makes her heart happy.

IWSG: EVER FELT LIKE A FRAUD?

Have you ever felt like a fraud? It’s a feeling I've been wrestling with the past few months.

I've written and told stories all my life. I've always had a project in progress. My creative mind usually leaps forward with more ideas than I have time to put on paper. This past couple of years I've not been as…active. So many other things, emotional and physical, have had to take precedence and by the time I deal those things writing just isn't the smooth flowing joy it has been. It’s become a chore and god knows I have wagon of chores and I cringe at another. I've never looked at my creative writing like that. A chore. *Shakes my head in dismay  

It's not to say I haven't written anything because I write a lot of things but majority is non-fiction and work oriented. Not the same thing. As far as creative writing most of it has been poetry which is a great way to put emotions into order, or so I've always felt.

I've had writing friends who've ridden me about stories I've written and why aren't I doing something with them. Bless their hearts, they mean well. They’re trying to motivate me, encourage me. I've done the same for them. Yes, I like the fact they've enjoyed reading my work and they feel it’s worth pursuing but…how do you tell them you just don’t feel like writing?  How do you say I look at this series and go meh? I can encourage others. I critique stories and proposals. I can crack the whip over them but I can’t seem to get ME going again. To find that inner fire. I feel like a fraud.

I've been thinking a lot about it lately. Haven’t found all the answers. I have had some creative ideas and those ideas were strong enough to shake me out of my…apathy? At least they excited me enough that I wrote a brief summary down and one is dancing around in my head where they usually play for awhile before making it to the writing stage. I consider that progress. I know part of the problem is finding that groove in time that belongs only to my muse and me. The other part is I’m chained to my computer so many hours in the course of the day the last thing I want to do is sit longer—I just want to escape. My schedule is so caddywumpus right now that I haven’t found that fun time for creating. I know I need to find it because I feel amputated without it.

My conclusion, after thinking about all this for some time, is I have to find a spot in my schedule that again belongs only to writing. Give myself permission to let go of everything for that time and just settle in and do. If I need to be away from my computer, and I do, then there is always a notebook and a pen. I can write anywhere, right? 

I’m working on it. J

MONDAY MUSINGS—HI-YO SILVER…

Welcome to September. Where the heck did the summer go? I hope you all had a good summer. Mine was far from the projected summer of relaxation and more balls to the wall busy. August has been intense training for a new aspect of my job while maintaining my normal work schedule. Insane.

Have you seen the new Lone Ranger movie? We saw it this past weekend on DVD. It's not a bad movie. Johnny Depp took a good role. Both my husband and I grew up watching The Lone Ranger and of course they were reruns on TV by the time we watched them. It was a special childhood memory for us both. So watching this movie elicited quite a discussion in the McKye household. Comparisons and memories.

There were a ton of westerns on when I grew up and my dad loved them. If you wanted to watch the one TV in our house you watched them, too.  My dad even had a western revolver with a gun belt and holster. Let me tell you, he practiced with that gun and was very fast on the draw and he was a good shot. Well, many a target died. J There were a couple of his friends that were big into that sort of thing, too. I still remember that gun with dark maroon cherry wood handles. It was fancy and my dad liked to dress in black when he practiced—the ultimate western fantasy. There is an old record album of Marty Robbins’ western ballads where he is dressed in all black in the middle of a draw—it’s on a dark pink background (seriously, pink?). We have a picture of my dad in a similar pose only he was much better looking than Marty and had a well developed chest and arms—he came by them honestly in construction. Made old Marty look a bit puny.  J

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I've never been a big fan of westerns and I'm still not although there are a few I like. The Lone Ranger was okay. It was entertaining and I loved Tonto and Silver was the coolest horse ever. I liked the fact that the good guys won and that they were tough but honorable men who lived by a code.

Clayton Moore played a strong character and that character became an American icon. Clayton Moore’s Lone Ranger (based on the original stories) was strong minded, heroic, and a tough man. He was larger than life. There was nothing wimpy about him. The Lone Ranger was an excellent marksman, he excelled in hand-to-hand combat, and in today’s standards he would be an

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above average athlete. He was the last surviving member of a group of six Texas Rangers that were ambushed and killed by the outlaws they were chasing. His brother was the captain of the Ranger group—Captain Dan Reid. It was in honor of his brother that he wore the mask made from his brother’s vest and fought for justice.  

I don’t think the Lone Ranger ever killed anyone except, I think, by a ricochet shot. If you remember the silver bullets were a personal reminder to him that life was precious and not to be taken unnecessarily.  It seemed he was always disabling them without a killing shot or shooting the gun out of their hand (amazing how accurate he was considering those are some very hard shots to make). It was the times, folks. Good won and evil was never glorified and always lost.

 

Lone Ranger Wallpaper

I've seen a lot of negative comments on The Lone Ranger movie. Part of it was the way the way Armie Hammer portrayed the Lone Ranger. Kind of weak and wishy-washy—I know it annoyed me. Tonto irritated others. A couple that made me laugh was about the portrayal of Tonto vs Native American culture. No, it’s not particularly politically correct but we’re talking about the historical period of 1868. C’mon people, prejudice abounded in that time frame against Indians. Most Native-Americans were caught between their heritage and fitting into the white world. You can’t rewrite history as much as you might wish to and even in today’s era of politically correct verbiage, prejudice is still just hiding behind the words. If you have lived where there is an Indian reservation and/or a large population of Native-Americans, I can assure you there is still a certain disdain in the general populace. 

As writers we know if we're depicting a particular historical period there is a need for good research so you cover the mores, dress and accoutrements and at least the flavor of the vernacular of the times. I have several nitpicks along that line in The Lone Ranger movie but the most grating to me were the weapons. Most of the pistols used post Civil War were Dragoon .44 caliber conversions

—take the old cap and ball and convert it to cartridge guns. Lot of experimental handguns in the late 1860's by both Remington and Colt. Some were fancy and engraved others just serviceable. Smith and Wesson got into the act in the 1870's onward.  I want to point out The Lone Ranger is using a colt in 1868 that wasn't made until 1876. Hello—fact checkers?

The movie itself was good. Cons: Lone Ranger was rather wimpy in the beginning and he’s sort of depicted as a city dude and wrongly as an attorney. He toughened up (but it took way too long since he should have been tough from outset) and became a hero. It had a bit more focus on Tonto then it should have and while he was always a main character in the original he never dwarfed the Lone Ranger. It wasn't Tonto and the Lone Ranger. The movie was a bit long and could have been edited a bit to give it a tighter storyline.

Still, it was entertaining, has some funny moments, and worth watching.

• Have you seen it? What did you think?